I think the moment that love has gone.  My sister is in a loveless situation, and is actually fearful of her partner.  She is in the process of trying to sell the house and leave, but for me.. I would have gone a long time ago.  Enough for me is the moment fear enters the relationship.  Although children are ideally thought to be happier raised in a house with a male and female, I would also argue that fear has no place in their's or the parents' lives.

I think Dr Phil (who I'm not always a fan of BTW) has a quiz on his site that you can do to help decide if to go or to stay.  If there is violence or harassment involved, I'd say leave right away, even if the finances are not in order.. there are shelters available as someome mentioned.

If it's just that the spouses have grown apart or that they just don't love each other any more, thats a much harder choice to make.  Do you work to rekindle your marriage or just walk away?  Dr Phil says that you need to “work our way out” of a marriage.. by that he means its best not to walk away without trying to fix it first.

such a hard question and one I don't think can be answered generally. I think each person has to reach their “bottom” and that could be different for everyone.  and more still the answer to this will depend on the ages and needs of children, if there are any. 

I have friends (siblings) whose parents fought their entire childhoods and waited until both were married with kids of their own to divorce.  my friend thought it was ridiculous that they wasted so much of their own lives, living with hostility, for the sake of the kids.  and as it turns out, mom and dad were wonderful friends, just horrible spouses!  when they told the kids they were getting divorced, they both said “what took you so long?”  lol  In this case, both kids grew up fine, but I don't agree with staying together for the sake of the kids.  of course, my life tends to be lived more liberal than many, so for my opinion to be out of the “norm” is nothing new 

I am so glad your friend was able to safely leave that situation!!  I think domestic violence is defintely a situation that needs drastic measures, especially when children are involved.  Unfortunately, it's a deeply rooted issue and your friend may have some long term emotional effects to deal with. not just the history of the abuse, but the low self esteem that usually is associated with domestic violence cases.  At least she is happy and safe now

(((HUGS))) to her, Nazreen.  It's hard to get passed it … the danger you lived in, the possible danger you exposed your kids to, the low you felt to allow that to continue … it's a difficult path.  It's great that she has a friend like you to confide in and she needs to see how far she has come, on her own!  she is stronger than she feels, I'm sure :*)